A Jersey Girl in Portland

Tuscan nettle (sweet) tart: A recipe is really just a set of guidelines.

I was listening to NPR the other day and heard a food writer talking about a Tuscan Spinach tart. It's a sweet dish and was served as a course in a Tuscan feast. The Romans were apparently less strict about having sweets as a dessert than as a course in a larger, savory meal.*

Anyhoo, here's the original recipe: Tuscan Sweet Spinach Pie

It sounded scrumptious but I didn't have spinach, maraschino cherry liquor, or candied citron.

Nor did I have a deep dish pie pan.

Did I let these minor setbacks deter me?

Absolutely not.

I didn't have spinach, I had stinging nettles. I didn't have maraschino liquor but I had Elderflower cordial. I didn't have candied citron, I had candied ginger.

And I had a shallow pie pan, not a deep dish one . So I cut the recipe in half and soldiered on.

I don't know how the pie will taste. I'm having friends over for dinner tonight so we'll see. But I do know that recipes are occasionally bullshit.Riddled with mistakes.

This one neglected to divulge the baking temperature of the pie. Gotta say, poorly edited recipes are a pet peeve of mine. Damn, if more than one person is reading a recipe, Get It Right.

Tuscan Green Tart:

For the Crust:

9 oz AP Flour (about 3 cups)

1 stick plus 1 Tbsp unsalted butter

3 oz (<1/2 cup) sugar

2 egg yolks

1 tspn baking powder

zest of one lemon

pinch salt

1 Tbsp water if needed

For the filling:

1/2 pound fresh nettles, blanched shocked and finely chopped (blanch for three minutes in lightly salted water)

4 oz blanched almonds

2 ea eggs, separated

1/3 cup sugar (divided use)

1 oz chopped candied ginger

splash Elderflower liquor

For the crust:

Cut together, or use a food processor, to combine flour, butter and sugar until it resembles course sand.

Add egg yolks, baking powder and zest and process until a dough forms. It will look crumbly and not particularly doughy. Pinch it, if it holds together, it's ready. If it doesn't, add 1 Tbsp water.

Mold into a fat disc, wrap in plastic and refrigerate.

Lightly butter a 10 inch pie pan.When the dough is completely chilled (about one hour), roll out the dough.  Place in the pie pan and trim the edges. Flute if you like. Roll the excess dough as well and plastic wrap everything and put it in the refrigerator.

Preheat the oven to 325.

When the filling is done, pull out the crust and dock it  (poke with a fork all over the base and sides of the dough). Either use the remaining dough, rolled out and cut as a lattice or make shapes with it to lay on top of the filled pie.

Filling:

Grind the almonds until they resemble course sand. Reserve. In a bowl, beat the yolks with half the 1/3 cup of sugar until well combined. Add the nettles, ginger and liqueur and mix well.

If you have a good mixer on a base and you haven't used it yet, get it out.

This is why you bought the damned thing.

In a separate bowl, (using the fancy mixer), beat the whites until soft peaks form. Add the remaining sugar and beat until it forms a glossy merangue. It'll take at least 5 -8 minutes.

Fold the meringue into the yolk/nettle mixture. Pour into thr prepared crust, top with decorative lattice, and bake for one hour.

Ooo Baby was this pie delicious. It didn't have a particularly nettle flavor nor did any one ingredient outshine another. It was hearty and well-enjoyed by The Tribe plus one new-to-me fella.

 

Eat well and love big.

xoxo

Nancy

 

*Frankly I don't know if this is an Etruscan or a Roman dish. I would guess that latter, because of the nature of a short pie dough. Anyway, I'd love a food historian to set me straight.

What do you eat when you're sick?

I've been home, practically bed-fast, for three days with strep throat. Strep arrived with a wicked fever, chills, ringing ears, throat too sore to swallow, and a headache/earache that feels like someone is sticking needles in my ears. I wince every time I have to swallow because it hurts like a mo-fo.

I know I'm sick because I have no appetite. At all. But I have to eat. On Sunday I made a small batch of chicken broth with veggies from some stock I made a few weeks ago. I managed to eat a cup or so. It hurts too much to swallow.

On Monday, I doctored Sunday's soup and managed another cup 'o broth but knew I needed real food. Really soft, real food.

When I was a kid, my dad used to eat soft cooked eggs on buttered bread when he was sick. It's remarkably milque toast-ish and really lovely. I used duck eggs and good sourdough. Mmmmmm. His sick food, like turbo charged comfort food.

It was yummy. Oh, so it's hard to beat duck eggs.

A day passes and I find myself needing to eat again. Still stuck at home. Still have needes in the ears, super sore throat, and overall weakness.

So I made Pasta Puttanesca. I had an old BF who loved to make pasta dishes. This was one of his favorites. It has a ton of flavor, olives, capers, sardines, tomatoes, garlic. What's not to love? It's called Whore's pasta, because it's made with easily stored ingredients. Anchovies, capers, olives, tomatoes, and pasta.

I used Mark Bittman's Pasta Puttanesca recipe, but added onion and a little bit of good quality beef.

Oh how yummy it was.

May you stay healthy.

and Love Big--

xoxo

Nancy

The finished dish: Pasta Puttanesca.

 

The Sadist of spring greens; Stinging Nettles.

For reasons large and small, I'm feeling kinda kinky this spring. I'm exploring some of the darker aspects of my psyche.* I'm also cooking like a fiend in my fabulous kitchen.

I was feeling adventurous on Saturday so I picked up two bags of stinging nettles at the Portland Farmers Market. Now, if I were a sadist (shut up you with the sassy remark), I would do wicked things with these nettles and bare nekked friends.

They hurt if you touch 'em. Really hurt like a stinging rash. I know this because...

(This story is rated PG13 for nudity and cussing)

...many, many years ago I was traveling in England. The Lake District I believe.

I was hiking alone, from a hostel to a a pub in a nearby village. It was a lovely hike -- what the English call a ramble -- through fields and over fences, fording streams on bridges as old as the earth itself. 

The pub was everything I thought it would be. Lots of old wood, fIre in the fireplace, a TV playing a soccer match. The food was mediocre, (I think I got a ploughman's and a curry), but the beer was sublime.

I had three pints of the local bitter.

Three pints.

When I left the pub to return to the hostel, I was stumbling a little but happy as can be. I was having an English Experience! It was a blast!!

I got out my map, and decided to return via the scenic route. The map trail skirted a large field. I decided that the shortest distance between two points was a straight line. So I cut across the field.

Or tried to. I scrambled over a fence and was overcome with the need to urinate.

<sigh> Being a woman, I had to find a place to squat where I was moderately protected from casual onlookers. I found just the place. There were bushes for cover and a huge, scenic field for me to look at while I peed. I dropped my shorts, and settled back on my haunches for a long (remember-- three pints) piss. I let loose, exhaled and looked up at my scenic field.

Oh SHIT! I'm eye to lips with a gigantic bull. RIng in the nose, dripping snot and saliva, snorting at me.

I leaped up, slipped in a puddle (remember-- three pints) and tumbled backwards into a bush, bare arsed.

I landed in stinging nettles.

I screamed so loud I scared the bull.

I made it back to the hostel and locked myself in the loo with tweezers and a mirror until I got out all the stinging bits.

The moral of the story: If an English hiking map steers you away from an obvious short cut, follow the map!

Enough of that silliness. Back to cooking. The nettles are medicinal. Loaded with vitamin C, and a great curative for allergies and dandruff.

I planned on making all sorts of lovely things with two bags of nettles I procured from Winters Farms. I was going to blanch and puree some, make a quiche or some pasta. I was going to make infused vodka, and dry some for later use in tea.

The nettles are blanched in salted water for a minute or two, then shocked in cold water. Simple stuff.

Alas, I've come down with either the flu or a killer cold. Either way, I'm going nowhere near a kitchen for the remainder of today and probably tomorrow. <sigh>

But I did make some lovely tea. And, well, I did infuse vodka (Hey, it's medicinal!) but the other projects will have to wait.

Oh, before I forget, it has a very mild taste. The Wikipedia folks describe it as tasting like spinach and cucumber, which sounds right to me.

I may still make fun stuff with the nettles.

 But I will keep them well away from my bum.

Love big and eat well.

XOXO

Nancy

* Actually I've been flirting with my dark side for the past year or two but with an ever-changing cast of supporting characters.

I can haz Brains!

Again with the Asian Market.

I went shopping with a friend at Fubonn and picked up some fun food to play with. Belly, brains and bitter melon.

Pork brains!

What I learned making brain sandwiches (linked to a Road Food television show with Alton Brown giving a little history of the sando):

1) Brains are more delicate than sweetbreads.

2) Brains taste like someome pureed liver into a batch of fluffy scrambled eggs.

3) Brains that come in a tub from the Asian market don't look much like brain photographs on the InterWebs

4) Aside from #1, brains can be treated very much like sweetbreads. Poached 'em and  prepared however you like. Sauteed, deep fried, floated in soup. Whatever.

5) Although not a food I'd crave... brains are not so bad. Really.

6) Making brains at home will cause your housemate to wonder if you've turned into a zombie. Yes, RoommateLisa tweeted her fears much to the amused delight of our tribe.

The Process:

 I began by rinsing the brains in a colander. This is when I discovered that brains are delicate and come apart/turn to mush very easily.

Next, I poached the brains in white wine and water with salt, bay leaves, juniper and dried (Colorado) chilies.

 

Once poached, I floured, battered and panko-crusted the little nuggets and deep fried them in peanut oil.

Next step, turning them into a sandwich. I wanted to make a classic Midwestern brains sandwich but much to my dismay, I had no mayo.* So I used a little mustard and bitter greens. 

Even without the mayo, both Belmont and I quite enjoyed the brains. Lisa was having no part of eating brains.

Either the sandwich was particularly delicous or I was really hungry. Yea, I was hungry.

Happy Brains to you,

Until we meet again....

Love Big, xoxo

Nancy

 

* Yes, yes, yes, I could have whipped up a batch of aioli. I have eggs, mustard and oil on hand. Unfortunately I didn't realize I was out of mayo until the sando was ready to eat.